God showed up with BLUE eyes!

Four years ago we found out we were pregnant with surprise baby #3. After the shock wore off we were so excited we just giggled a lot. We wanted to wait until we got further along before we told Luke and Jacqulin but, Bert couldn't keep his mouth shut. We were doing a lot of Christmas shopping and I was afraid that we would run into someone Bert had told and our kids would find out from strangers that they were going to have a new sibling

At Thanksgiving my Mom wasn't feeling well. She didn't even eat Thanksgiving dinner with the family.
We started having some problems with the pregnancy. The doctor assured me that if we made it through the first trimester then everything should be fine.
At Christmas my Mom was really bad. Her doctors couldn't find anything wrong. Two days after Christmas we admitted her to the hospital and were told she had bone, kidney and lung cancer. Mom passed away on January 11, 2005. Two weeks after we admitted her to the hospital and 2 weeks before her 70th birthday.
In the 2 weeks my Mom was in the hospital I was admitted to the hospital twice, once in Huntsville, once in Nashville. Both times we had ultrasounds and saw our sweet little angel dancing around, waving and even having a bout with the hiccups.
Five weeks after my Mom died Olivia Elise joined her grandmother in heaven.




We were originally admitted to Baptist hospital for me to be on bed rest for 10 weeks, my amniotic sac had a tear. The first night I was there, February 15, I asked the nurse if I could hear her heart beat just one more time before I went to sleep. Bert was already at home with the kids and my friend, Heather, was with me. The nurse couldn't find the heartbeat. She ordered an ultra sound. Around 9:00 p.m. we were able to see that tiny little frame inside my body was, this time, completely still...including her heart. Heather just hugged me and prayed. I'm sure we cried but I think mainly it was just shock.

The next morning the doctors induced labor and 36 hours later I delivered Olivia. It's hard to be in a delivery room that is completely quiet, no crying baby, no ooohs and aaaahs. There was however a beautifully formed baby with 10 toes and 10 fingers, tiny ears and mouth.

When I last saw my mom I had been rushed to the ER because I started hemorrhaging. They sent me to my Mom's house for bed rest. I was really feeling alone, like God couldn't hear me. I secretly prayed that God would give Olivia the same blue eyes my Mom had. Bert, Luke, Jacqulin and I all have brown eyes. I told no one of this prayer because I needed to know if God heard me. If he loved me.

Throughout labor the nursing staff was amazing. They would come into the room and tell us that at 19 weeks and 3 days gestation the baby would be 9-10 inches long, she would weigh less than a pound, and her eyes would be fused shut.

When she was delivered she was 9 1/2 inches long, she weighed 7 ounces but her eyes were wide open and they were BLUE. God had not only heard me but he cared enough about me to answer my prayer.

I don't know why we couldn't keep Olivia here on earth but I do know that according to the March of Dimes over 900,000 babies die every year just in the United States. We aren't the only ones who've lost a baby.

I've had 4 years to think about what all this means and what God is up to. As Christians we are so offended by the amount of abortions that take place in our world/country. I think I have realized until we Christians let people know how much our "wanted" babies mean then we can't grieve those whose parents didn't intend them.